Dear Abby: Should we tell our friend that her husband is cheating on her best friend?

DEAR ABBY: Our friend “Carrie” revealed to our close group of friends that she has been having an affair with her best friend “Julia”’s husband for the past few years. Their children are best friends and they spend a lot of time together, even when they go on family vacations.

We have often told Carrie how this could affect the children, which she acknowledges, but the affair continues. This dirty secret is getting harder to keep because we love Julia, but no one wants to be the messenger. Should we tell Julia, or wait until it inevitably comes out? — ROT IN RHODE ISLAND

DEAR ROTTEN: Are you sure Julia doesn’t know about the affair and hasn’t chosen to ignore it? Julia has children who still live at home. If you spill the beans, what will that do to the intact lifestyle they presumably enjoy? If you’d rather not hear about Carrie’s jokes anymore, tell her you don’t want to hear about them anymore. But I vote for keeping your mouth shut when it comes to making the revelations.