6 phrases women use when they can't be trusted, according to psychology

You may first feel it in your gut: something is not right in the relationship. You struggle to put your finger on exactly what it is, but the problem is elusive. You should be able to trust her completely and without question, but the unsettled feeling lingers after you try to communicate about the problem you can’t quite identify. She then utters a vague sentence that subtly betrays your trust.

Here are six phrases women use when they can’t be trusted:

1. “I’m doing well” and/or “I’m doing well”

She leans to the side and rests her head on her hand Inside Creative House via Shutterstock

These words are often signs that things are not going well. Beneath your wife’s calm exterior is a pot of boiling water about to boil over suggested by John Gottman’s study on conflict involvement, escalation and avoidance of marital relationships.

— Jennifer HargraveOwner and manager, Hargrave Family Law

2. “You’re the only one who thinks that”

She grins and tilts her head Bricolage via Shutterstock

When a woman wants to isolate her partner’s perspective as a way to debunk their concerns, she will tell them, “You’re the only one who thinks that.” Using this phrase may make the other person wonder if he is wrong for having a particular point of view.

Using this phrase is an example of emotional manipulation. According to psychotherapist Dr. Marni Feuermanis the best way to avoid being emotionally manipulated by building your emotional intelligence. Dr. Feuerman defined emotional intelligence as “the ability to identify, use, understand, and manage emotions in a positive way to communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome obstacles, and defuse conflict.”

She further explained, “Emotional intelligence involves being aware of your emotions and recognizing what others might be feeling.” While emotional intelligence can be deployed in ways that hurt people, developing a strong understanding of your feelings can act as a protective force against toxic relationships. suggested by a study in Personality and individual differences diary.

— Alexandra BlogierWriter

3. “I Don’t Have Time”

Busy and frustrated woman at the desk takes a phone call PeopleImages.com – Yuri A via Shutterstock

They have become distant and are closed off or unwilling to discuss marital problems as they arise. A study in the Magazine for marriage and family supports that if tHey, if you suddenly aren’t as present as you were in the past, especially during activities you used to share or during difficult moments, trust is eroded.

— C. Mellie SmithWriter

4. “I Still Got It”

She looks seriously at the camera while outside blvdone via Shutterstock

Insecurity and looking at others go hand in hand as a threat. The absolute worst behavior I’ve seen in people came from people who were unsure of themselves – and that also means turning against people who want to help them.

Think about it. A study in the Journal of Family Psychology explains how a scarily large percentage of people cheat because they want to feel good about themselves or know “they still have it.” That is uncertainty at work. If they were confident in their work, it wouldn’t be such a big deal.

Insecurity creates incentives to make a person betray others and push others down in a desperate attempt to feel good about themselves. The more insecure they are, the stronger the urge to put other people down.

— Ossiana TepfenhartWriter

5. “Why would I do that?”

She is touching her hair and looking seriously at the camera PeopleImages.com – Yuri A via Shutterstock

Answer a question a question has a huge red flag indicating the possibility of cheating. Honest people deny immediately.

They usually answer, “I didn’t do that.” According to Frank KardesDeceptive people are evasive, and when caught off guard, they need extra time to come up with a credible response. A response like: “Why would I do that?” buys the deceitful person valuable time to formulate such a response. The key to detecting deception is to listen carefully to what someone tells you.

— Jack Schafer, Ph.D.Behavioral analyst

6. “I’m Not Talking About It”

With a slight tilt of her head, she has a blank expression Bodnar photo via Shitterstock

There is always a reason someone avoids a situation, a subject or a person. It can be for many reasons, including telling a lie. For example, if you ask someone where they were, and they don’t want to tell you, but don’t want to lie, then avoidance becomes the next best option. supported by research published in Frontiers in systems neuroscience. This also shows up as changing the subject.

You have to be careful with this. There are reasons why people should avoid misleading the subject. I avoid talking about politics with my family, not because I’m lying, but because I want to avoid an argument.

— Joshua Mason author and leader in the field of public safety

When the emotional presence in a relationship doesn’t feel right and the communication doesn’t seem to fit the topic, it’s time to pay close attention to everything. Vagueness begins to look more like deception when there is an underlying issue of mistrust or betrayal.

Listen to how she talks to you. If the subtle signs of avoidance are present, it’s time to dive deep into what’s keeping her emotions from expressing honestly.

Will Curtis is a creator, editor, and activist who has worked remotely for the past decade.